written by Boris Sobelman
Story by Gene Roddenberry
FIRST DRAFT, dated November 1, 1966
report & analysis by Dave Eversole
This script was changed relatively little between this first draft and filming. A few rearranged scenes here and there about covers it.
Sulu is not seen in the teaser. We fade in on the bridge where Kirk is waiting for Sulu and Lieutenant Agnon (ONeil in the aired version) to report in from Beta 3000. Uhura receives a desperate call from Sulu begging to be beamed aboard.
In the transporter room, Sulu throws the bundle of proper clothing at the sociologist, here named Lieutenant Luster (Lindstrom in the aired version).
Act One begins in the briefing room where we learn the background of Beta 3000. Luster leads this "info dump" scene. It ends as Kirk tells him to prepare six sets of proper clothing.
After they have settled into their room for the night, there are further discussions about Festival--information that we eventually learn in the aired episode, save here it is simply lumped into a couple long talking scenes.
Act Three contains a scene wherein Scotty tries to get information from Sulu:
INT BRIDGE ANGLE FAVORING SCOTT
He is anxiously watching the control panel at his station. He turns toward the new HELMSMAN.
Helmsman. Orbit status.
No change, Mr. Scott. Orbit still
decaying. Eight hours to atmosphere.
Scott frowns, punches a button on his console.
Sick Bay. Collins.
Awake. Smiling. Peaceful.
Scott scowls, thinking.
Ill be right down.
INT. SICK BAY ANGLE ON SULU
Smiling benignly as he sits up in bed. CAMERA PULLS BACK to reveal Scott standing by him.
I cannot reach the captain, man.
Can you not tell me whats going
on down there?
All is peace and harmony. Soon we will
join them. It is the will of Landru.
Sulu, this is Scotty! Listen to me!
Whats happened to the captain?
He is in tune. He belongs with the
Body. There is no danger, friend.
All is peace. We will join them.
Kind hands will pull us down.
Will you stop talking nonsense?
Those kind hands of yours will burn us up
in the atmosphere unless I get some help!
Landru will help. Turn to Landru.
We are in his hands.
Scott glares helplessly at him. . .
In Act Four, we have this scene on the bridge:
INT BRIDGE THE ENTERPRISE
Scott, working his controls with an assistant, AMES, suddenly reaches a decision. He turns, his face bright.
Ames! I think. . . if we reverse
our impulse engines. . . channel
them through our radiation deflectors. . .
maybe we can neutralize those heat rays.
Its a slim chance, maybe, but. . .
Joy to you, friends.
They whip around.
FULL SHOT BRIDGE
Sulu stands there, a phaser in hand, aimed at them, smiling benignly.
Landru wills it! We will go down!
There is joy waiting for us.
He moves the phaser away from Scott and Ames. All aboard stare at him, dismayed.
Stand away, friends. You would
interfere with the will of Landru.
Stand clear. . .
Helplessly, Scott and Ames move away from their control panel.
Sulu. . . listen to me man.
Well burn up!
Joy, tranquility and harmony will
be yours forever. Kindly is Landru,
who cares for us. Fortunate are
you, who soon will join him. . .
He smiles happily at them, phaser aimed and ready.
This stand-off is never really resolved. The next time we see the bridge, Sulu is back to normal and resuming his post, no mention of the phaser he was holding on Scotty.
The humorous tag--"Youd make a splendid computer, Mr. Spock," is not scripted.
I actually dislike this episode more than "The Alternative Factor." Just may tastes, though. Ive always referred to it as "Three Acts In A Basement," as once Kirk and crew get there, they never really leave, just wander in and out.
This first draft really reveals nothing new or special in this dreadful mess.
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